Accept Others by Accepting Yourself

“There is no such thing as perfection, but in striving for perfection we can achieve excellence”

-Vince Lombardi

It is not possible for a person to be better themselves through superficial means, such as money or fame. We differentiate ourselves from animals because they do things based on instinct, while we humans have the creative influence and mental capacity to influence others and the world around us. Each and every action taken by a person will influence others. What matters, however, is the intention behind the task; a positive intention with a positive task not only helps the person doing it but causes a domino effect of positivity. Thus, the only way to be objectively better is to influence the world around you positively with good intentions.

I won’t lie and say it’s simple, but I can tell you that it is very possible. However, every person is dealt their own cards, so personal growth in your own circumstances depends entirely on you. There are a few pointers which I can suggest to help you become more empathetic towards yourself and others. The first step is to realize that even the best person to ever exist wasn’t perfect. Thus, there will always be flaws in your character; recognizing and accepting this will make you more open to see your own faults.

Secondly, it is good to include self-reflection in your daily routine. I prefer to do it on a morning walk. It’s a very simple task and not only does it help you understand yourself, but it also helps you keep a level head. The way I do it is to look at my recent actions, especially those relating to other people. Have I treated them appropriately? Did I infringe on someone’s rights? If something you did made you feel bad, there are two things you need to do:

1. Accept that it was the wrong thing to do and…

2. Ask yourself why you did it and why it made you feel bad.

Asking these sorts of questions is a good way to get to know yourself. For example, if I insulted my friend. Firstly, I should apologize, admitting my mistake. Then I’ll ask myself why I did it. Let’s say for the sake example my friend had something that I wanted but didn’t have, which in some way was related to me insulting them. I’d accept that I am jealous of them instead of denying it and I would learn to be more appreciative of things I do have.

Speaking of friends, I would like to bring up the influence your friends have on you and vice versa. Surround yourself with people who are honest with you and, more importantly, honest with themselves. Try to help your friends realize their own faults. Be mindful though, as bombarding someone with their flaws day and night won’t help anybody. I would like to say that this shouldn’t be a one-off thing; self-reflection should always be in the back of your mind, and with all the interactions we have day-to-day, there is always a lesson to be learned about how you deal with people.

Now remember, I am no professional, so take my words with a grain of salt. But, if you want to be an objectively better person, you should strive to understand and work on your own flaws, as the only way to do so is to influence the world positively with good intentions.